Sometimes you can hear that the rules of behavior, good manners, etiquette, etc. are hypocrisy, and a "real christian" should tell a truth to everyone's face, especially he should tell an unpleasant one.

In this opinion, which, at first glance, has a sound grain, there is a substitution of concepts.

Really, christians should not be hypocrites. But the point is that all our pursuits and actions must be done with understanding. No youthful maximalism is acceptable here. And it is always worth to sort out priorities correctly.

For example,let's imagine that we have woke up on a cold, gloomy day in a vicious mood. This happens quite often. And what is it? Do we necessarily have to "unhypocritically" inform the whole world about this? Here, for example, we are greeted: "Good morning!", and in response we grumble: «What are you talking about?!». And the mood of one’s, who greets us, is now also spoiled. But formally we acted "not hypocritically." Is this Christianly?

No matter how conditional and burdensome the rules of behavior may seem to us, they are created exactly in order to hurt our neighbors less. And also in order to keep ourselves within a certain framework.

After all, we far from always keep the commandments of God at will, we have to force ourselves very often, have to fight with our passions and spiritual laziness. So the same here: no matter how bad our mood is, it is not the fault of our neighbor – it is better to force ourselves to respond politely and thereby to save a peaceful spirit in our neighbor. And, as a rule, we ourselves in such a situation also become more facile and kinder.

But there are such zealots who, having read the lives of the saints, where it is mentioned how this or that saint sharply denounced sinners, consider themselves to have the right tobe rude and to chin others.

Here it is necessary to understand that the saints, led by the Holy Spirit, received revelation from Him, to whom, what and how to say. Whom to comfort, and whom to convict.

But in order to take our colour from such saints, we must first reach their level of holiness. As a first step, it would be worth imitating their struggle, first of all, with our own sins, their love for God and for neighbor, their pure life, but not becoming a "fiery fighter with sinners and apostates."

But to pass off our anger, intemperance and bad manners as jealousy of the Lord is the true deep hypocrisy that we all need to fight first of all, instead of accusing the rules of behavior and those who observe them of hypocrisy.

Recorded by Natalia Goroshkova